Friday, November 14, 2008

Trashy McFeline Update:

--to read more about how the nastiest cat in town forced itself into our lives--
--visit our friend's & neighbor's page here--

Although I truly wanted to let my imagination run wild with ways to mitigate the cat "problem"... Hannah talked me into taking it into a shelter.

Unfortunately, on the way to the animal shelter my practical side got the best of me and I had a bit of an epiphany...

Why was I going out of my way to take a rather gross not-really-a-kitten-anymore cat that I didn't want to a place full of animals that nobody else wants?

So I had a little bit of a training session with the cat and explained that it pretty much had two choices.

By choosing option one, it could go with the more conventional stop, drop & roll, where it would quickly learn about gravity. In case it preferred to postpone the effects of gravity, I gave it a crash course (pun intended), in the principles behind Bernoulli's theorem and the mechanics of flight: lots of speed, right attitude, and a tail to hold it steady.

Then I pulled into the fast lane on the freeway, carefully rolled down the passenger's side window, did the pre-flight checks, (landing gear, flaps, tail, engines,) and positioned the box it was riding in in the "eject" position.

... man that cat can JUMP! ...

At home, Hannah told me that Lena searched for the cat for all of 5 minutes...

"Kii-iii, wheah d' go?!" (Kitty, where'd you go?)

"Oh no! Wheah cat!"

"Caaa-aaaat" (the "t" is actually silent)

Then she got absorbed in a book and forgot all about our little visit from the stink fairy.

Disclaimer: No animals were harmed in the actual making of this post. Some, however, may have been harmed in the research material for it. We take no responsibility for damaged windshields, broken headlights, paint chips, spray, splatter, or plopping of animal bits or other material that you may have come in contact with as a result of your reading said post. Also, this didn't really happen. The cat was taken safely to the shelter, of sound body... we can't vouch for the mind.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

I Meant To Post These A While Ago But...

... life is pretty busy with two. Oliver is almost three months old. I can't believe it - it feels like we've had a visit or two from a time-thief. Here are some pictures from a few weeks ago of Oliver rolling over.

And some of Lena...
One of her new favourite things is playing with Daddy's torches.

And another thing she likes to do is play with writing utensils.

It took about a week for all of that to come off.

And one for Grandpa P.

More to come.

Friday, November 7, 2008

[Mormons] made bastards of their (the homosexuals') (adopted) children...

Regardless of someone's stance for or against Proposition 8, the pedantic backlash against the Mormon church by the opponents of the California ballot measure is pathetic at best, and ridiculous no matter which way you look at it.

It is high time that equality became an absolute idea, truly afforded to those who claim to seek or defend it, especially by those who pretend to seek it so desperately. How unfortunate that those who concocted and executed such an excellently managed campaign for their beliefs have resorted to juvenile tantrum-like ragings against anyone they can blame.

It reminds me of times when I was a kid and wanted something so badly that I thought it was a "need", wove a story and presented it to my parents, (who inevitably saw right through it,) and then screamed any manner of insults I could think of at them when I didn't get my way. Common retorts included, "It's a free country, I'll do what I want!" "You can't take that away from me, it's my right!" and the thought "I'll show them!" followed by an attempt at never speaking to them for a million bajillion years.

As a child, rules existed in my house, which were aimed at teaching me how to interact in an acceptable manner with those around me. Thanks to my wise parents, these rules also specified a set of consequences for not accepting and not abiding by those conventions. Rules exist in a society to define the way in which we must interact with those around us and the consequences for our failure to do so.

Thankfully, we live in a society where we as citizens have the right to adjust, as we see fit, and by the voice of the majority of the people, said conventions, rules, and consequences. This is exactly what took place in California; the voice of the majority of the people decided that the State of California should be a government in which marriage is defined in the Constitution as being solely between a man and a woman. To claim that the Mormon Church, or even the State of Utah took away the freedom of 5,642,343 million people who voted yes (as of 7 Nov, 2008) and "forced" this measure to pass is absolutely ridiculous. 

I want to make it clear that I am not attempting to pass judgement on the number of upstanding homosexual individuals whose lives this measure did touch in an extremely personal manner. I am expressing my disgust with the very vocal minority of individuals who, like petulant children, are lashing out in anger and frustration against a false stereotype and an institution they may know little about, simply because they did not get their way and want someone to blame. The ones who acted in this instance are the 10 million plus CALIFORNIA residents who voted on the measure, why no backlash against them, no cries of bigotry? Much better to find a scapegoat (in the form of the LDS church) than to face the truth: The majority of Californians who voted would like their constitution amended to say that marriage is strictly between a man and a woman. 

Railings against Mormons for making bastards of the adopted children of the 20,000 homosexual couples married since the law was overturned by the California courts, and cries to punish the state of Utah are nothing more than querulous bellyaching and should be regarded with as much weight as one affords to a child who persists in throwing their toys out of their crib.

As we DO live in the United States of America, with all of her glorious freedoms, I say let these people express themselves according to their various rights, in ways that are constructive and non-slanderous. If they feel that they can not abide by the newly amended constitution, let them pursue such legal remedies as prescribed for alteration of the legal codes.

Until such time, feel free to stand up for what you believe in, but please quit the whining, stop with the tantrums, grow up and act like adults. I know that I always found that when I was trying to get something from my parents, it helped to act like a grown-up. After all, we don't let children get married, now do we?

Saturday is a Special Day

Last Saturday, Evan and I decided that we needed to devote some time to chores around our apartment that we don't usually do on a regular basis. We decided that we would focus on our windows. I ironed curtains (yes, Mum, you did read that right), and Evan, with a little help from Lena, washed the outside of the windows. Our windows looked as though they hadn't been cleaned on the outside since the last millennium, and we were both sick of wasting Windex and time by washing the windows on the inside and it having no impact whatsoever their apparent cleanliness. I would say that there was a fine film of filth on the outside of our windows, but that would be incorrect. There was a fine film of filth on top of a fine film of filth on three more layers of grime.

I have to confess I didn't spend all of the time ironing the curtains. For the first little while I was having coronary episodes while Evan half hung himself out of our windows (we live on the third floor of our building). I had justifiable visions of my husband slipping, falling out, and, at best, breaking his back and not being able to work or go to school. Fortunately, Evan came up with a genius idea which meant Lena could help too... and the idea did not involve rigging a hoist and dangling Lena off the roof. He managed to take the windows apart so we could clean them in our kitchen.

Lena had a blast. She really liked helping, even if she wasn't all that much help. Plus, now our windows are clean. I can't believe we were living in so much squalor! When we were done we were so amazed at how crisp everything looked, how bright the colours outside were, and the amount of light that was finally able to make it into our front room. It was fantastic!

Tomorrow we are going to trying vacuuming. Hopefully we will soon be getting our money's worth with our very own personal slave.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Our Conversation with Lena at Dinner

Mum: "Hurry up and finish your food Lena"
Lena: "I wan up"
Dad: "No, not until you finish your food. And then you can get in the shower"
Lena: "No shaow [shower]. I wan baaaa-f [bath]"
Dad: Ok, you can have a bath.
Lena: "Shaow-baaaf [shower-bath]"
Mum: "Yes, shower monkey will be there" [we keep a monkey in the shower so she doesn't traipse wet monkies around the house, and so we don't have to deal with the ordeal of Lena's monkey separation anxiety]
Lena: (pointing at Oliver) "Oll-ber. Poopoo"
Dad: "Is Oliver stinky?"
Lena: (laughing) "Ha ha! No!"
Dad: "Does Lena have a poopy nappy?"
Lena: "No. Daddad. Stin-ty [stinky]."
Dad: "Is Lena stinky?"
Lena: (laughing) "No" (laughing harder) "Ha ha ha! Daddad poopoo [Daddy has poopy pants]"
Dad: "Oh really? Daddy's stinky?"
Lena: "Eeeeeew! Daddad stin-ty [Daddy stinks]."
(laughing really hard)
"Daddad poopoo. Daddad eeeeeeeeeeeeat poopoo [Daddy eats poop]!"

Whilst we aren't encouraging our daughter to run around telling people they eat poop, we just lost it on this one. It was all we could do to keep breathing because we were crying with laughter, and telling her to keep saying it over and over again.